A Girl Like Me is Impossible to Find :)

happi...

haha. reading my friend's blog made me happi. coz he's happy..and when my friends are happy, i'm happy too

(note to myself: what an exquisite use of vocab dear me..)

happy. its a word that just eclipses everything else..replace it wif delightful, vivacious, wonderful, splendid..yet the word happy just means happy and encompasses all happy feelings, don't u think?

so i'm happy. reminded me today, despite my dad's pep talk, it was a happi day. it was the 2nd time my religious class performed the aftnn prayers together wif of coz the guys leadin..tis time it was the transfer student. his youth and yet his ability to lead the prayer makes me hapi. then of coz, the smartest guy (whom i respect tons) took over the doa..tho i dunno what he was reciting bt still jz wow. considerin that well my family ahem hmm hmph sigh ah nvm.

then my mum didn't haf her class so i went home wif plans to go out wif her sn afterwards. dear2 cum along..the 3 of us ended up in fairprice xtra at amk coz my mum wanna shop for groceries so dear and i helped her to carry all her stuff. it was the first time he came along on one of our mother-daughter trips yet he doesn't seem to mind. he was quiet as he is such a kind bt hpefully mama wasn't too bothered. i cant imagine a malay guy in his position. would he be as obedient? wuld he haf make my mum laugh..or wuld he be impatient and be horrendous at following us the entire noon. i wonder..

and it's a wonder i shall not wonder coz i love my dear 2much to wonder what if..and coz i lack confidence in being wif a malay guy..it's not them, it's me. jz a disability in my communication skills wif them - nvr had the chance to know or be wif malay guys cept for my family n of coz,my cousins.

anyway, i felt dear enjoyed himself. we even bought sushi rice, sushi mat and erm two packet of seeds to plant..we were on the verge of buying soil too bt my mum convinced us its cheaper at the wet mkt)..y i felt he was happi. coz he helped himself to his indulgence (jellies) aftr at first, refusin my mum's offer to buy for him (he gaf my mum some ntuc vouchers so my mum felt obliged to buy for him somethin tat he likes)

i love my dear n his patience. for all the times we have gone thru n wateva time we may haf left, i cherish this 4 years n more to come wif strength n optimism..and now the strength to believe that maybe i do haf a real-time long lasting shot at love.insyallah-wif god's will.

(note to me:check, double check, triple check - jz tk a look ard Me n the happi feelins such as the abv will soond dissipate. Immediate.)

happy = at ease.

posted by Siti Nuraishah @ 1:14 AM