notes from penang...
On the way back home from penang...1. "Everywhere i go, i try to understand the locals' way of life - how they live, love, how they go about living life, loving life. In penang, surrounded by jess's family, i found...security. i feel fathers being proud of their children' lives (even though they are far away from home), i feel husbands protective of their family nests. malays or chineses, i saw wives working hand in hand, leaning twds their husbands, secure ("i do the housework with her as well. we work together. she won't do it alone" - jess's dad). and i realized, penang's way of life is simple - you deal with what you have, and make the most out of it. you study, you work, lucky ones like jess n her siblings get to go abroad to study/work. for those who stay, they stay for good. they live life; they get married, have a few kids, and the cycle starts over again. i knew because i spotted jess and her bf boarding the next train of life's wagon - enquiring at a bridal fair. anyway, families remain close knitted - weekend may be spent on family trips to nearby tourist spots, or at each other's places. in singapore, we do that too,but we know family time's a luxury, one which may even be treated lightly at times as one goes about chasing their dreams and happiness. in penang, it's a way of life -one key reason that makes life meaningful."
add. notes from my mum - that's because they rarely get to see each other. in singapore, we see each other till at times, we do take each other for granted. but again at val's place, i managed to gt rare glimpses of their close-knitted family. maybe,it's just my family that's dysfunctional....
2. this note goes out to my friend...
"hey, i finally understand. i understood that god has different plans for all of us and i finally understood that you may be right. maybe life for you has a higher purpose, something that i childishly denied by imposing my own ideals of life. Maybe you're right, you're destined to reach a higher level of life which most of us can't. although i still believe everyone has their soulmates, it does not mean we have to be with them eventually. anyway, if that is what you truly believe; that when you're tired of the corporate life, you'll begin your journey, your ascent twds enlightenment away from all of us. if that is what truly makes you happy, i give you my blessings. if you ever feel that its not working out, remember us here @ ground level - your friends,who'll always be there for you no matter what stage of life we are in, and no matter how far away. sometimes, i know i'm just a selfish soul, wanting so much for people to live life fully, with the people they love. in reality, it's cos i'm scared - of losing the people i love;family and friends, especially the beautiful friendships i have.but if this is what it takes to bring you closer towards enlightenment and me to allah, it is a step we both know we'll take, for ourselves, and for each other. we plan, god decides.
insyallah one day, we'll meet again at the middle path,the straight path twds allah's love (for me) and enlightenment (for you). persistently, i still believe enlightenment needs not be a lonely path.
"I've tot abt u wanting to be a monk. in a strange way, i understand, if that's what makes u happy. every1 haf different ways twds reaching enlightenment. agree?"
"It's not only reaching enlightenment. It's to free oneself from attachment too."
"Yep. so one day you'll be ready for it. you have my blessings if ur ever prepared 4 it one fine day. :)"
"May not be in this life cycle. When the time comes, it comes..."
"Here's an excerpt of the book i got 4 u. - Life's a series of tests. Difficulties are tests. We are in a school now. Our whole life is a school, from the time we were born till we die, we are in school."
posted by Siti Nuraishah @ 12:16 AM
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