A Girl Like Me is Impossible to Find :)

Happy

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side so I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

*happy* i realised i'm always blogging about unhapi things and its depressing to think many many days from down when i'm old,i'll get to read only about unhappy things in my life...

i was happy few days ago because i met up with like 12ppl from 4e2 together with mr.Kelvin Yap(now an RI teacher) n we had tons to catch up with. Awesome awesome night,it felt as though sec.3 and sec.4 days of English/Literature lessons were only yesterday...it hurts the fact that we cannot go back to those days no matter what...but its wonderful to just see each other grow up left right centre, straight,single or submerged in couple bliss...within and outside 4e2..

I realised that these bunch of ppl have been wif me from like when i was sec.3(and some i even knew from pri.sch) up till now and i'm already 20...these bunch of ppl Will leave memories that will be hard to erase,and i hope those memories will never be erased no matter what..i mean,its so fun,4 years after graduation and half the class still meets up like Constantly or like few times a year..its like we never really left secondary school,you know?its more like we brought the memories forward and built on them as we go different ways in our lives...itz just awesome la..

and whats beautiful,in my opinion,is the fact that Mr.yap can remember many details about Our class and some of us that we don't even remember or we felt that it was vague/unimportant..he Remembered them lor.Its jus so touching la and most of the details were quite farnie also.

He's gettin married in 2 years time(like finally la,we all pester him for so long) In a way,its like he grew up or spent his 'late 20s' being with us also apart from teaching us la..since we always invite him out(though the last time we saw him was a year or two ago)..its juz a wonderful feeling which i juz dunno how to describe la.it makes mi feel that i(and all of us) never really graduated from Bendemeer or the class.Instead,we graduated physically and continue to bring in more memories and details which are outside the classroom walls which bonds us closer because at the end of the day, We, 4e2 2001 BSS were formed as a class. We're a miracle and i love it..like secondary school never really ends mentally bt rather continue to grow from our hearts as one..aww shucks,i'm going mushy..i hope ms0401 will be like that in the future too =) i believe i will keep in contact with some people but i dunno if most of them will bother to meet up, haf fun and reminisce the days we haf as a class..which are still occuring now n for now those 'beautiful days' are actually quite sianz sometimes ^^

yah,happi mi..wat else made mi happi recently?Making up wif jasper n treasuring each moment of our relationship lor..because it is after all a volatile one based on shaky grounds though we try to stabilise it alot..and we really try,bt if at the end of the day it doesnt work out because of who or what we are(e.g race,identity or religion, values etc) no choice but to move on..but at least we will know then we had tried enuf..

happi also the fact tat i finally got my mum to make her 'spectacles' after seeing her so long using the magnifying glass to read the papers..managed to drag her down after years because tis time ard,i got a voucher! haha..oh well.

and i watched 'LILYA 4-ever' wif Norisha..well,actually dragged her into watching it..i felt sorri for her because its a very depressing movie and wats worse,its real la.Its about child prostituition that happens in less developed countries or deprived states in rich countries.the movie made mi feel like some rich girl in some rich country watching it only for 'entertainment' and 'educational' purposes..its time to be proactive in small ways first..tell me how. In all,there were 17 or 18 scenes where the bastards whu fucked the girl were huffing and puffing their dicks away like some wretched thirsty dogs wif their tongues lolling out n their breathes coming in short gasps..-.-!!It simply degrades them of their integrity as men and basic human beings if u noe wat i mean ba.Worse,its on big screen..well,they must have really been 'talented' actors ba ^^ Bt what u expect from a movie with the word 'prostituition' right? SIGH-its a depressiong realistic movie..produced by UNICEF;go watch it,it has a gd script,just prepared to get grossed out...i did.Not so much because of the sex scenes(well kinda)but more because it doesnt haf a happy ending because stories like this never have happy endings..sick bastards..i feel sick dat i dunno where to start to help such kids out of their situations..hmm

ok,now i feel depressed.shall slp already and hopefully haf happi dreams in return =) Nitez.

posted by Siti Nuraishah @ 12:08 AM